Questions

344

I always watch out when I ask about something. I don't like having bad attention on me so I try to behave, shall I say. Whenever a teacher shouts at me or tells me that I'm doing something wrong or bad, I always have a panic attack and the guilt hardly leaves me.


For some reason though, people find it absolutely fine to question everything to do with me:

Why are you doing that?
Does that even make any sense?
What's the point?

Not to mention criticize:

That's so stupid!
That's irresponsible!
You're an idiot!


Why do people feel so free when it comes to judging me, my brain, my heart, my person? It's almost like they're trying to make some kind of celebrity out of me, but only the negative parts. Why?

What is with all of the interest on my behalf? Can't people just let me be creative, smart and be who I truly am? Is there a problem with that? Sometimes I just don't understand. I'm under a line that I can't cross because when I do, people attack me from every side. People have me stereotyped and I get judged on every corner. People think they have me written out, like a book character. Well what if I'm that one character that isn't quite understood, is different? That keeps surprising the readers with secrets? Now wouldn't that be a scene.

Unfortunately, my life isn't a book.
And even if so, I'm not Olivia.

Love, GABBY